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Random quote: "Father, unless I judge I cannot weep." ~~ Wkb
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Still listening.....? Barbara
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roxana
Posted 2017-12-06 11:51 PM (#225864 - in reply to #225699)
Subject: ...all the help needed if asked for....


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Yes, (Fran), still listening and doing too.  It has been busy.  I just now come to see you all and say hello.  To town one day for groceries and a medical for myself.  Mom's birthday yesterday, 94, a spontaneous, unplanned enjoyment for all.  To town with her today for eye check up and lab test.  I find Raj's last so very pertinent.... so grateful.  Finding that the only thing that does work is listening and shutting up.... and then often grumbling at the need to do... but am ever learning to be willing to Let Father's Will Be Done, and then discovering what that IS and letting it change me.  Thank you Fran.  

About that 'my time' thing we think.  I find myself unable to accept it, and it lays me low often not knowing how to respect another's need all the way around because I'm often confronted by my lack of clarity around that idea, and it is a pretty big idea, a foundation for our life or not, or maybe I should say that with it we outline our expectations... is this Father's will?  I do notice though that the things which have worked for mom, her joy and comfort and a change to increased strength, clarity and sanity go in hand with the doing and sharing of things which have come out of my willingness to listen and act on the Listening, on Let Thy Will Be done, rather then complying with that idea of 'my time'.  

It's just not easy because, mainly because I haven't learned to trust in the Listening part well enough, and I've had doubts about what is true so I've affected by a grey area, much like neither yes nor no pretty often in my own mind and that in itself has been the biggest difficulty.  But I have a good sense that this will change now.  And you know what?  I had sat down to Allow only For Fathers's will, in regard to some needs that are high up, and so I was moved to come here tonight and heard Raj's latest share, and in it I found so much truth, such incredible 'coincidence',  that I feel that I've finally turned the page, and I can exhale and get off feeling angry or heavy about having to do what needs to be done.... I'll bet you my own bp will normalize now too. I sure welcome that. 

Going to catch some sleep.  Love, B 

 



Edited by roxana 2017-12-07 12:25 AM
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